Saturday, August 1, 2015

No I Ain't Followin No Rules!

Referring back to the post about treating me like I'm untamable, I just do not understand how things like the breakfast incident keep happening to me! Like, I am sooooooooooo overt about not giving a fuck about rules and that I'll do whatever I want, so how is it that I STILL get harassed to do shit I ain't gonna do with the pretext of "it's mandatory." What part of  "I don't care about rules" is so fucking confusing to everyone? Okay, I could understand someone simply informing me that breakfast is mandatory just in case I didn't know, and that might make me change my mind. There are some cases where something being mandatory does matter to me because I figure they'll be giving out information that I really need. But this was NOT a case like that. This breakfast was in the middle of the event, not at the beginning. But the night before, the group leaders emphasized that breakfast was required and said that we all had to go and they would expect to see us there, so it's not like I could have *missed* the fact that it was mandatory. And on top of this, I was stuck sharing a room with the person who was saying I had to go because it was required, which is really horrible because I did't have any privacy. If I were at my own house, I could have simply not shown up, and if people called me I could have ignored them. It's not right to take advantage of someone like that just because you've got them cornered and they don't have an option not to deal with you!

Why is it that no matter how much I talk about being untamable and not caring about rules, people are so fucking shocked out of their wits when I actually behave like the person I've been telling you I am all along???

Or like the homework thing. I SAY that I hate school and it's the least important thing to me, so why does everyone act so shocked that I ain't offerin homework help cuz I ain't never gonna have the homework done when you ask your questions? Like, it's okay to ask and all, but why the shock when my answer is no I can't help you cuz I ain't even cracked the book open? I have SAID a gazillion times that I don't give a fuck about school so why is this so fucking shocking? Could you people please open up your brains and remove the part that says "Nikki is a good student" and throw it out for fuck's sake?

So then I'm sittin at the one tiny piece of orientation I decided to go to (which was a huge mistake and I should not have gone cuz it was no fun!) and some students are talking among each other that they're not sure how to dress for some president's address that night, and one of them asked me what I'm wearing. I said that I wasn't going, but I that it seemed like a slightly nicer event than this part of the orientation. I said it probably wouldn't be super formal, like something wear you'd need to wear a dress or a business suit, it would be a little nicer than this part, so maybe black pants or a skirt would be more appropriate, but I assured them that since it was still just a campus event, there would probably be plenty of students who didn't dress up for it and were just wearing jeans. I thought I was being helpful by advising them even though I wasn't going, but everyone at the table was so fucking shocked that I wasn't showing up! Seriously, what is it that I'm doing that gives off this vibe that I'd rather sit and listen to some old guy in a suit yammer on about school stuff I don't give a fuck about when I could be at the beach instead?

It's just, I think back to the kids at my high school who never did anything and their attitude was always like "Why the fuck would I do that?" about EVERYTHING and everyone expected that outa them and they didn't get pushed around cuz everyone knew they didn't care about the rules and were like fuck the system I ain't doin shit! WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO BE TREATED THAT WAY????????????

No comments:

Post a Comment