Thursday, April 23, 2015
All I know is that I will do whatever it takes to undo all the taming I've received. The greatest compliment I could ever get from anyone would be if someone told me that I behaved like a kid who had never been punished before, like a kid who ran wild, that I was truly untamable and it was beyond anyone's ability to make me behave. I can't bare the thought of leaving this earth without someone telling me that and truly meaning it.
The thing is, I *would* prefer to do not-so-horrible things in order to reach this goal, but if it doesn't work, if I find that I'm still acting like someone who was disciplined as a child...then I'll have to take it up a notch. If what I try to do is not good enough for me to be that kind of person, then I'll have to do something more extreme. And if the more extreme thing still doesn't work, I'll have to take it up yet again. This could get very ugly very fast, but I mean it when I say that I will stop at NOTHING to be untamable, no matter what it takes.
No matter what.