Thursday, April 16, 2015
I could post a nice picture of myself here, smiling from the top of a mountain or the middle of a big party. I could get 100 likes if I wanted to. But I don't want to. I don't want social approval for doing positive things. I don't want people to latch onto that smiling girl and think they can be friends with her and only her, while disregarding all of the not-so-desirable things. I act how I feel, and how I feel is entirely dependent on my situation. I do not want praise for being happy. I am happy due to external circumstances. If you praise me for being happy, I cannot trust you because I know that you will also look down on me for not being happy when my circumstances change. I will only share happy things with you if I can trust you to accept that they are circumstantial, to not give me approval for feeling good, and to give me the same validation when I'm not feeling happy.