Sunday, February 1, 2015

Staying Friends

If you hate a particular kind of food, but you're starving and it's the only food available, you'll probably eat it. That doesn't mean that you like the food, or that you would willingly eat it in any other context.

I am not willing to live without cuddling and talking about my feelings. If I'm in a position where the only people I can talk to are people who aren't really nice to me and don't validate me and respect my choices, I will absolutely lean on those people, talk to them, and treat them like my friends, the same way I would eat a food I hated if it was a choice between that and starving. It does not mean that I want to stay friends with those people once I'm out of that environment. It does not mean that I EVER want to speak to those people again once I'm out of that environment. You do not have any right to push me to stay in contact or on friendly terms with anyone that I've said I'm done with. You do not have any right to guilt-trip me into keeping people in my life because we once got along. People change when bad things happen. We may have gotten along back when my life was better, but if someone won't validate my feelings and respect my boundaries when I'm not doing well, then I don't have any interest in being friends with them. We may have also gotten along because I put up with stuff I was never really okay with from them, simply because I had no one else to talk to. These are my life choices and I will not be pressured or guilt-tripped into staying friends with anyone I don't want to stay friends with.

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